Daily Thoughts

From Wallyworld to Trumpworld in 38 Miles

The weekend began as any other Saturday. We would be doing our usual errands that we do on Saturdays and end up at WalMart to do our shopping for toiletries and a few small food items that we thought we needed to do some “fall” baking. So we jump in Randys car and head out. It is unseasonably warm.  Walmart is about a 30 minute drive from our house. We have found that folks out here tend to shop Target more than Wallyworld, but we just cannot make the switch. Before I start my story that I want to tell you about, I have to tell you about our  shopping at WalMart in Texas. To be honest, we go to WalMart for the fried chicken tenders that they sell. Someone that worked with Randy back in Cowboy and Indian land, had told Randy about WalMart chicken and that you just couldn’t find better fried chicken anywhere. So one Saturday, RC told me he had a surprise for me. So off we go…..now in my mind, I’m thinking, “oh, I bet he is taking me to Neimans to have a piece of our fav coconut cake” or “wow, he remembered that we had our first date on this day and wants to take me where we went that day” or, “oh I just love her so much, I think I’ll surprise her and go buy her a new diamond ring for being the best wife EVER”….so as I was trying to decide which of these surprises we were headed for, we are by this time, in the parking lot at WalMart there in Plano…..I couldn’t figure out why this was a surprise, we went almost every Sat to WalMart. Before getting out of the car, he told me to just trust him and follow, so follow I did. We headed straight to the deli where lo and behold, he grabs a package of Hawaiian rolls and orders 4 fried chicken tenders. I am still looking at him trying to figure out what he is doing and why, of all places was he ordering chicken when I’m sure we must be headed down to Neimans for lunch. But he paid for our chicken and rolls and off to the car we go. He found a shaded parking space under a tree and proceeded to open the rolls and put a chicken tender on it and hand it to me. SURPRISE!!!!!! This was my surprise. A chicken tender sandwich in the parking lot of WalMart. You’ve got to be kidding me. He tells me to go ahead and try it. I figure if I am ever going to get him to Neimans, I should go ahead and humor him, so I did. I bit into it and oh my gosh, he was right. It was the best fried chicken I had had in a very long time. We sat there and ate until all of it was gone. I instructed him that if he ever told any of my Northwood Women’s Club friends that I was eating a chicken roll sandwich in the parking lot of WallMart, I would never forgive him nor would I EVER EVER make him another chocolate pie. So now we had a new tradition. WalMart Picnics! Guess I need to get back to the story I started to write about.

We arrive at WalMart and he parks as far away as possible to give us exercise (like we wouldn’t be getting enough walking in on Sun walking over the entire golf course down in Palos Verdes looking at all the old cars and new cars that was on display.

It is now 103 degrees and as we enter the store, I begin to remember just a “few” more things that I needed than I thought. When I began to throw them into the basket, RC kept reminding me that we are in his car, not mine. His car is a two seater with a small trunk. As I am merrily skipping down the isles throwing in chocolate chips, sugar, cocoa, cream cheese, flour and sugar, he shakes his head. I know, I know, so what if we need to have a little sack of chocolate chips between my feet for the 30 min ride home. I can deal with that. Oops,I forgot, we need paper towels and toilet paper. Since company will be coming soon, we really need to stock up on the large economy size of both thinking we don’t want to have to come back for a few weeks. Oh, my goodness, I forgot, I have bunco at the house on Wednesday, so “honey, lets go ahead and buy some new flowers for the front porch to spiffy it up,” so by the time we get to the check out counter, Randy is off trying to find another basket to roll our “few” items out to the car in. One basket wasn’t enough. So we begin to load the groceries into the car, and quickly run out of trunk space and begin to load items to the inside. Let’s just say that people driving behind us now will know what brand of toilet paper we use. The only place it will fit is in the back window. The flowers, where will the flowers fit, I already have all the chocolate chips and sugar and flour in my lap and one pot of flowers between my legs. Where will we put them? Randy decides that he can drive with the other pot of flowers wedged between his legs. Am posting this picture so you get the idea. We arrive home safely and unload the car. I had to get out first, take the flowers from between his feet before he could actually get out of the car, but we made it. We are stocked and ready for company and cannot begin to think about our day out tomorrow after church,going to the Trump National Golf Course for the Concours DeElegance Car show. The car show that he has wanted to go to for many years and now, we finally get to go. It is great living where you can actually go to some of the places we have always wanted. So off we go to Palos Verdes wearing our “golf course attire”. We don’t want anyone to think that we don’t belong at this classy place, so Randy wears his best tennis shoes with his best tennis socks and his cute little visor he got free when he bought a shirt at a sale up at Big Bear. So we arrive and are so excited to be by the ocean where it is so nice and cool and so many beautiful cars are parked all over the gorgeous golf course. Truly an amazing car show. Randy now tells me that he made us rsvp at the Trump Club house for dinner which is a very nice surprise. But you should see me. My hair is completely flat, the makeup I had on has all sweated off and my shirt is sticking to me because of the heat. We look like two little ragamuffins. Walking into the clubhouse, I felt like the Beverly Hill Billies coming to town. Randy heads off to the bathroom and when he comes back, he is laughing. I ask him what he is laughing at and he tells me he will tell me when we sit down at the table. We are shown to our table, which overlooks the ocean. What a beautiful sight. I begin to relax thinking maybe no one will notice that my hair is flat, straight and sweaty when Randy begins to tell me his bathroom episode. He got tickled thinking that there he was, thinking he looked pretty good in his “nicer” tennis shoes with new socks that came from WalMart and was standing between one man wearing Gucci shoes and the other wearing Farragamo shoes. He finished quickly.

We got so tickled but as we looked out over the beautiful ocean and the gorgeous landscape, we remembered that it just doesn’t matter what brand of shoes you wear, or what our hair looks like. It is such a great feeling to know that  we can have fun with each other,  whether sitting in the parking lot at Walmart or sitting at the Club House at Trump National. It is great being married to your best friend. Thank you Randy for always making our lives so interesting and joyful. You are a blessing to me.

Next weekend we are going shopping for shelves to put all our extra toilet paper and paper towels. I found a package of each when we got home. We don’t need to buy either for at least 6 months. 

Beverages · Breads

Pumpkin Pancakes

Searching for new recipes for the holidays, I found this one in a little cookbook that I had bought for one dollar quite a few years ago. It is a little cookbook that is called Holiday Celebrations, which was on a bargain table at Mardels back in Dallas. I have used so many recipes out of it and this one will make your Thanksgiving morning or Christmas morning breakfast so easy for those who just can’t get enough pumpkin during their holidays. Wouldn’t these be wonderful sitting down to them with a cup of Starbucks Pumpkin Spice Latte?

2 cups biscuit ix

2 tables packed light brown sugar

2 teas ground cinnamon

1 teas ground allspice

1 1/2 cups undiluted evaporated milk (not Eagle Brand but Pet Evaporated Milk)

1/2 cup solid packed pumpkin

2 table oil

2 eggs

1 teas vanilla

Combine all dry ingredients. Add evaporated milk, pumpkin, oil, eggs and vanilla. Beat until smooth.

Pour 1/2 cup batter onto lightly greased, preheated griddle. Cook until bubbly on top and edges are dry. Turn; cook until golden brown. Serve warm with syrup.

Breads · Cakes · Chocolate

Chocolate Chip Coffee Cake

Went to a brunch this morning and had the most delicious and moist coffee cake I think I have ever had. The middle of the cake had melted chocolate chips, combined with sugar and cinnamon and it looked like it had a layer of fudge right there in the middle of the cake. So naturally I had to come home to see if I could find a recipe that sounded like what I just ate. So after surfing the web, (maybe if I surfed in the water, I might loose a pound or two) AllRecipes.Com had this one that sounds and looks just like the one we had. So am sending it your way. Am going to bake it and take to art class on Friday. Am so excited to make it and well, actually I’m a little more excited about having a whole one to myself than making it, but will share it with others since I really do only surf the web.

INGREDIENTS

  • 1/2 cup butter, softened
  • 1 cup white sugar
  • 2 eggs
  • 1 cup sour cream
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
  • 2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
  • 1 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1 cup semisweet chocolate chips
  • 1/2 cup white sugar
  • 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon

DIRECTIONS

  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) grease and flour a 9×13 inch pan.
  2. In a medium bowl, stir together the flour, baking powder and soda. Set aside.
  3. In a large bowl, cream the butter and 1 cup of sugar. Add eggs, sour cream and vanilla. Mix well.
  4. Add the flour mixture and combine. Batter will be thick.
  5. In a separate bowl, combine chocolate chips, 1/2 cup sugar and cinnamon. Set aside.
  6. Spread half of the cake batter in prepared 9×13 inch pan. Sprinkle half of the chocolate chip mixture over the batter. Repeat with the remaining batter, and then the remaining chocolate chip mixture.
  7. Bake at 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) for 25-30 minutes or until a toothpick inserted near the center comes out clean.

Uncategorized

Breakfast Casserole

This morning I had to take a breakfast casserole to a brunch to feed 20 ladies. I went on-line and found this one, which turned out to really be a keeper. I think the ladies liked it because it wasn’t so “eggy” because of the potatoes and bread in it, it had more substance and different flavors. Several wanted the recipe so here it is.  Great for holiday mornings because you make it the night before and bake it in the morning. So easy.

1 lb Jimmy Dean Mild Sausage

1 medium onion, diced

1 medium green bell pepper ( I used a 5 oz can of diced green chiles instead of the bell pepper)

1 (2 lb) package Southern Style Frozen Potatoes, thawed

2 tables garlic, chopped

6 slices of either Texas Sliced Toast or French bread sliced (if using French Bread, it will take more than 6 slices) Enough to put side by side in the bottom of a deep 9×13 pan.

butter, as needed

seasoned salt to taste

8 eggs

3 cups milk

4 cups shredded cheddar cheese

Brown the sausage till done and then add onion and potatoes with garlic and green chiles or bell pepper, or both pepper and chiles.

Mix it all up in skillet and cook onion is clear and soft. Take off heat and set aside.

Spray a deep 9×13 pan with Pam. Butter the bread and lay, butter side up in the pan. Layer all of the meat/potato mixture over bread. sprinkle the cheese over this mixture.

Mix eggs and milk together and pour over the top. Cover and refrigerate overnight or at least 5-6 hours. Bake at 350 for about 1 hour and 15 to 30 minutes. Take out of oven and let sit for 10 minutes before serving, giving it time to set up before dishing out. 

Cakes · Desserts

Dream Whip Cake

A very popular cake in the 70’s and 80’s, this cake is extremely “fluffy” and moist. It is simple, but very very good and because it rises so high, makes a beautiful layered cake on a pretty cake plate.

Preheat oven to 325

1 cup milk

4 eggs

1 teas vanilla

1 teas almond extract

1 teas butter, softened

1 package dry dream whip (you can find it on the grocery shelves over by the cake mixes)

1 small box instant pudding (I use chocolate pudding for the chocolate cake and french vanilla for every other flavor)

1 Duncan Hines Cake Mix (flavor of your choice)

Combine all ingredients and mix for 4 minutes.

Bake at 325 in 2 (9″) layer cake pans which you have greased and floured. Bake until toothpick comes out clean when inserted in middle of cake (usually about 25-30 min, depending upon your oven.

Perfect Buttercream Frosting

1/3 cup milk (I like to use half and half or whipping cream)

1 teas vanilla

1 teas butter flavoring

1 stick butter

1 box of powdered sugar (1 lb)

Combine ingredients and mix until any lumps are out of butter and sugar.

Daily Thoughts

Labor Day in Big Bear

This past weekend, we were invited to a friend’s house up in the mountains at Big Bear Lake. We were told, “well, you poor things, you have had so much company and must be tired, why don’t you and Randy come up for the long weekend so you can rest, sit out on the patio and read and we will just relax and have lots of quiet down time.”

Well, my goodness, did that sound like a great weekend or what? So Randy and I headed to the mountains Friday afternoon, with nothing packed except lots of books to read, an extra pillow for those long afternoon naps and pen and paper for writing some long overdue letters. After all, we would have plenty of time to write, being that we would be sitting outside with our feet up, laying our heads back to soak up the gorgeous sunlight, all while sipping at a glass of iced tea or hot tea, depending on the temp.

We were excited about the “restful” weekend we will be having, when upon arriving, we look over to the side of their house and see a cord of wood that had been delivered for their fireplaces. Oh good, we will have plenty of wood for that sparkling fire that we can curl up on the couch and enjoy, while reading and snacking on cookies and hot chocolate.

We are welcomed by our friends and told, “we need to get a good nights rest because tomorrow, we have lots to do and explore.” I’m sure she means lots of reading and exploring magazines and such. But…next morning we finish breakfast and we are off to a car show. Now, I like car shows as much as the other wives but, I can “enjoy” the car show in less than 30 minutes. All you need to do is walk in the middle of the street, looking at both sides at once, you can finish and be home to sit and read in less than an hour. But not this time, we allow the guys to control this little outing, so we stroll and look at old cars, at new cars, at refurbished cars, cars that need refurbishing, cars that still run and cars that don’t run. While the hubbies have their heads under the hood of one car, trying to decide what type of cylinders it has, we ladies sneak off to the tea room for a delightful lunch. OK, now we’re cooking. I bet after the tea room, we are going to go home and sit outside and just reminisce about all the cars and carburetors we saw at the car show. One of us, who shall remain nameless, decides that we will shop for a while. So off we go to discover new fall goodies that are in the stores. We arrive at home and I’m thinking, “yeah, I will go upstairs and have a nap, but will be oh so quiet as to not wake up Randy from a nap I think he must be enjoying, but where are the guys? We look out back and find them, hauling all the wood from the side of the yard to the back. What? What has happened to our quiet and relaxing weekend? Did we miss it, maybe we came on the wrong weekend!

I am now looking through cabinets, luggage and my purse, for pain medication and aspirin  so Randy will be able to move when he wakes up in the morning from hauling the wood. Tomorrow, yes, tomorrow  will be “the day” of relaxing. We just needed to get all the “honey do’s” out of the way and I’m sure that we will have plenty of time after church to sit and relax.

Sunday comes and we go to town for lunch after church and we discover that we didn’t cover all the stores yesterday, so off we go to finish seeing how much money we can possibly spend before the stores close. We found out that you can spend a lot. Well, our pocket books are empty so we head back to the house, where we find, once again, the guys (except Randy, who is upstairs faking a nap to get out of working) are finishing moving the wood. BUT……here it is, a whole hour that we get to sit outside on the patio and read and talk before going inside to prepare dinner. Oh, but a nice hour it was. It gave me time to read the intro to a new book, “10 New Ways to Relax” before jumping up and begin cooking.

We hear at dinner that plans have been made for the next morning. We will head immediately after breakfast to the Mountain Summit to ride the chair lift up to the top where we will have a wonderful relaxing lunch. We will be snapping pictures of the valley below, pictures of the majestic trees and the beautiful lake we are now able to look down upon.. Ah…the quietness of being swept through the beautiful air via a chair lift. Well……now your talking. I can’t wait. I go to sleep Sunday night with anticipation of the morning ride up the mountain, dreaming of the pics that I will take as we take the chair lift back down. How will the lake look from up that high? Will Randy hug me tightly professing his love to me as we gaze into the beautiful blue sky that is wrapping its arms around us, gliding down the mountain in the quietness of the moment? We both sleep so soundly as we think about the next day and the thrill of the “mountaintop experience.”

During breakfast, we hear some talk from some of our table mates that they are thinking about walking back down the mountain instead of riding the chair lift. We quickly tell them that idea does not appeal to us in the least and that it is not a part of our “relaxing weekend”.  We head out to the mountain, buy our round trip chair lift ticket which includes lunch and off we go to find the chair lift. Here it comes, our chair lift that quickly picks us up off our feet and sweeps us into the air. I look over at Randy and his eyes are closed and his knuckles are white from gripping the bar that is holding us in. He is turning white and weird noises begin to come from him. Noises of fear and panic and I remember that he is really afraid of heights. When I ask him if he is ok, he just responds by shaking his head, not uttering a word. I try to talk about how beautiful the scenery is, hoping that this will take his mind off the fact that there is about a 1000 foot drop below us. He just keeps his eyes closed for the 20 min ride. We did it, we are up at the top and the view is truly spectacular. We have a wonderful lunch and get ready to head to the chair lift when the “host and hostess” of our weekend, suggest that all 6 of us really should hike down the mountain. Well, I don’t know about you, but this little city girl who just had a pedicure and doesn’t really believe in exercise until your Doctor tells you that you “have” to, is not about to walk down the 1200 ft drop to the base of the mountain. When I look at Randy, I can tell that he would rather walk it than ride down, so I tell him that since he rode up in the chair lift for me, I will walk down it for him. So, here we go……surely this is just one of the places that is steep and it won’t all be like this, as my feet slide from the loose rocks. Halfway down one of our group says that she thinks two of her toes are bleeding. Mr and Mrs. Hostess are up in front, smiling and telling the other 4 of us to just smile, enjoy the scenery and in a flash, we will be back to the base. After about 15 min of continually going downhill, my knees begin to shake and are already feeling like jelly. Did the guy at the top say it would probably take us about 45 min to an hour to get down? It’s only been 15 min and I’m about to just sit on my bottom and scoot all the rest of the way down. I have no choice but to continue, there is no way I can climb back up to ride. We are told by Mr. & Mrs. Hostess that we have to stop and smile, every time we get to a sign that points us to the “hiking trail”. We let her take our picture, but we aren’t smiling. We finally tell her to take a leaping jump after the first 3 signs. We stop because a rock has bounced into my shoe. Have you ever tried to get a tennis shoe back on, standing, downhill, while standing on one foot?  The only whipsers of love I have heard from Randy is, “if you don’t make it all the way down, I will be sure you have a proper burial”. After an hour, we reach the bottom of the mountain and because I now cannot even raise my leg to get in the car, Randy has to lift it for me. We ride back to the house and begin preparation to leave for home. We load the car and say our goodbyes and head back down the mountain, as it should be done, in a car……My knees and feet will never be the same. I figure that I will finally get the much needed rest when I am in the hospital having a knee replacement next week. We found out why this weekend is called Labor Day…but we are now headed home where we can sit in our Lazy Boy chairs and relax and read until our little hearts are content and feeling comes back into our toes. We truly had a most fabulous time with friends who we are now bonded to because of the cooking together, sitting around the table eating together, working together outside,  but most of all the “challenge of doing something that got us out of our comfort zone….together” It was indeed a Labor Day of Love. Thank you Bonnie and Arnie, we won’t forget this very special time. I’m sure the after our bodies recoup, we will realize how good that was for us. But next Labor Day, I think we will invite some company to come visit, that way we will get some much needed rest.

Casseroles · Chicken

Chicken Pesto

This is on the Paula Deen web page and sounds like a winner to me. The flavor of pesto, chicken alongside veggies and fettuccine is a great combination and so easy and quick to prepare.
Ingredients

  1. 1 (16-ounce) package fettuccine
  2. 1 pound fresh chicken tenderloins
  3. ½ teaspoon salt
  4. ½ teaspoon ground black pepper
  5. 1 tablespoon olive oil
  6. 1 small onion, thinly sliced
  7. 1 red bell pepper, thinly sliced
  8. 1 yellow squash, halved lengthwise and thinly sliced
  9. 1 zucchini, halved lengthwise and thinly sliced
  10. 2 cups heavy whipping cream
  11. ¼ cup prepared pesto

Instructions

  1. Pepare fettuccine according to package directions and keep warm. Sprinkle chicken with salt and pepper.
  2. In a large skillet, heat olive oil over medium heat. Add chicken, and cook for 2 to 3 minutes per side, or until golden brown. Remove from skillet, and cut into ½-inch pieces.
  3. Add onion and bell pepper to skillet, and cook, over medium heat, for 3 to 4 minutes, or just until tender. Add squash and zucchini, and cook for 3 to 4 minutes, or just until tender. Stir in cream and pesto, and cook for 5 minutes, or until slightly thickened. Add pasta and chicken, tossing gently to coat. Serve immediately.
Makes 4 – 6 servings
Cakes · Chocolate · Desserts

A Super Duper Chocolate Cake

This is a perfect chocolate cake to bake and have around the house for the weekend. Every time you go through the kitchen, just slice another bite or two off to treat yourself for cleaning the windows, changing the sheets, bathrooms, etc…..this chocolate cake is the perfect amount of cocoa and satisfies that chocolate craving.

Then end that perfect Saturday night grill meal, with a big piece with cinnamon ice cream along side it in a bowl.

 

3/4 cup butter

3/4 tsp baking powder

3 eggs               1/2 tsp salt

2 cups all-purpose flour   2 cups sugar

3/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder         2 tsp vanilla

1 tsp. baking soda                                          1 1/2 cups milk

 

Allow butter and eggs to get to room temperature. (about an hour)

Lightly grease (or spray with Pam) the bottoms and sides of 3  (8 1/2″)round or square cake pans.

Set pans aside.

Preheat oven to 350. In medium bowl,stir together the flour, cocoa, baking powder, baking soda and salt. Set aside.

 

In a large bowl, cream butter and sugar until light and fluffy, about 3-4 minutes. Scrape sides of bowl and beat on medium another 2 minutes. Mixture should be very light and sugar dissolved completely. Add eggs, one at a time, beating for about 1 min after each egg. Stir in vanilla.

 

Alternately mix in flour mixture with milk, on low until both have been mixed in the butter mixture until well combined. Divide and spread cake batter into the 3 cake pans.

Bake for 30-33 min or until toothpick inserted in middle comes out clean. Be sure to watch very closely as you do not want a dry chocolate cake. When the middle of the cake looks a little glossy, it is either usually done or within a 1-2min of being done.

 

Frost with Chocolate Frosting:

In large saucepan, melt 2 cups (12 oz bag) of semisweet chocolate pieces with 1 stick of butter, over low heat.  When melted, cool for 5 min. Stir in one 8 oz sour cream. Gradually add 1 (1 lb) box of powdered sugar (4 1/2 cups). Beat on medium speed until mixture is smooth. Add 1 teas vanilla and mix well. Spread between cooled cake layers and on sides and top.

Daily Thoughts

He Restores My Soul

Being 62, I have read Psalm 23 more times than I can remember, but until this past week, I can honestly say that Psa 23:3 that says, “He restores my soul” had just been words that reminded me of another attribute of our Lord, but it truly had never meant so much to me as it did this past week.

This morning as I was getting ready for the day and thinking back over the last week, particularly, last Saturday, I sat there and thought to myself, “what a difference I felt today, as opposed to last Saturday”.

Last weekend I did something that I really could not believe I did. It was something that the world would not look on as really a “big sin” or would even not even look upon it as anything done wrong, but the minute I opened my mouth and let words out of my mouth that should never have escaped, I knew that what I had just said, even the thoughts that went along with it, had greatly saddened the Lords heart. It was hard to admit that it was plain and simple, sin, that had now caused me anger at myself and heavy conviction of what I had done. All weekend, I tried to push the feeling away. I thought maybe if I talk it out with Randy, that would make me feel better. Surely he would have words to make me feel better. When that didn’t work, I thought, well, I will confess it to God and knowing that He is always “faithful and just to forgive” I thought well, that will do it. I will be rid of the shame of the sin, but that didn’t work. I tried to stay busy, going back over it in my mind, time and time again, I was going to bed thinking about it and it was the first thing on my mind upon waking. Finally Sunday night, I knew what I had to do. First thing in the morning when the store opened at 10:00a.m. I had to call the lady and apologize for my actions. Words cannot tell you how hard it was to do that. Knowing I had to do it to make things right, I struggled all night, knowing this was before me. It was truly a time of regret, knowing that if I had just “walked in the Spirit” and displayed the fruits of the Spirit, I would not be having to do what I was having to do to have peace. It showed me how sin can truly separate you from the peace of God and we must be willing to suffer the consequences of our actions, when we are disobedient to the Lord.

With the focus on ourselves in todays world, we feel that we can be restored and renewed by going to a spa or going for a massage or doing something we feel would pacify the void in our lives because sin has truly separated us from the “peace that passeth all understanding” which we receive from the Lord.

Before calling the lady at the store, I ask the Lord to give me words and strength as I knew I could never do this without Him. He was faithful to me in making that phone call. It was amazing how I felt when I hung up. Each day since Monday has brought more and more peace and today, as I was sitting there, I began to realize that I truly felt “restored” in the Lord and knew that even though this was a hard lesson, it will always be a reminder to me that when I am tempted to do something that is against the “laws and commands” of the Lord, I will stop and think about how it feels to be separated from that wonderful relationship I have with God and the peace that fills my heart when I”walk in the Light as He is in the Light”

Today, ask the Lord if there is anything that is keeping you from being able to know that perfect peace. If there is, “go, leave the alter and go ask forgiveness from the one you have sinned against”.  Your Soul will be Refreshed and Restored.