I am not saying that when you and your husband or wife go to storage you will automatically get a divorce, but let’s just say that if your marriage isn’t real solid, you might want to stay away from getting Christmas decorations from storage units. Don’t make the trips together…trust me on this, your marriage will suffer.

We decided that since we have several Christmas events coming early, this was the only weekend that we had free to get all the decorations out of storage. We began our morning on a positive note. I even made my man eggs, bacon and pancakes for breakfast. We drove both cars so that hopefully we could get this dreaded chore over by noon, making only 2 trips instead of 4 or 5. We arrive at storage, riding up the elevator, Frosty keeps reminding me that this is the year we are going to “refine” our decorations. I thought I had done that last year when I got the decorations to fit in 29 boxes instead of 40.

We began to pack both cars and needed to head back up for another load when he reminded me to lock my car since my purse was in the front seat. I gave him a dirty look and told him that I most certainly had already done that. Hello, I’m not that blond. We went up, loaded up the dolly again and arrived at our cars. When he told me to go around and unlock my car to open the front door, I sheepishly looked at him as we both saw that I had pushed “lock” on the key, the only problem was that I had left the car door wide open, right by my purse. Frosty is now starting to have a melt down. As we are pushing the dolly, two of the boxes fall off and I hear glass breaking. That did not do our mood any good. I immediately call him a bull in a china closet. Maybe we need to take a break and listen to some Christmas carols.

When we are carrying boxes up the stairs, (yes all this has to be carried upstairs) one of the metal chairs that sit one of my Santa’s falls over and cuts my lip open. Now my lip is swollen and we aren’t singing carols anymore. We get everything from this trip upstairs and I tell him that I will NOT carry anymore boxes upstairs until after dark.It is just to embarrassing to think that neighbors might be watching us and wonder where in the world would all this stuff go. We ran into one of our neighbors who quickly ask if we were moving, when he saw us carrying up all the boxes. He wishes. I sent a picture of all our décor to our daughter and she told me that she thinks I have a problem. My problem is that I can’t force myself to throw out all the things that bring back memories when I take them out of the boxes. Besides, if I threw all this stuff out now, what in the world would the kids have to do when we pass? All these boxes of “treasures” assure us that our kids will be working for their inheritance. It serves them right for continually buying us more knick knacks. They say, “oh we had to get it for you, it just had your name written all over it”. Really? Is my name really on 38 angels? On the last trip home from storage, I envisioned us having a lovely dinner tonight, maybe chile and cornbread all the while listening to Christmas music as we begin to unload boxes and Frosty is putting the tree up. Reality hit. We are so exhausted from carrying all the boxes upstairs, we ordered pizza. Forget the music, we aren’t in the holiday spirit right now. All we can think about is taking some aspirin and going to bed. We are giving all our kids Gift Certificates for marriage counseling this year. We want their marriages solid before they decorate for Christmas.