Daily Thoughts · Uncategorized

Anniversaries Bring Annoyances

April Anniversaries, ah….makes the month go by so quickly when I spend the first 2 weeks of April trying to plan something special for Mr. Romance. The 3rd week we spend celebrating and the 4th week, is usually spent taking back all the gifts each other has bought for the other and promising that the next year we will just plan a trip instead of trying to buy gifts for each other. So here we are in the last few days of our special month. Leading up to the 18th was really a little different this year. Because last year, Randy was not able to travel or go anywhere due to a dislocated shoulder and broken bones in his arm (and no, I didn’t get so annoyed that I hit him) and told me that he would NOT go out to eat until he could cut up his own food, we celebrated at home for our special day. This year, he wanted to make up for the past year, so we began our day at Starbucks then went shopping until we dropped. We did come home for a few hours to rest our achy feet and then drove to Scottsdale to have dinner at Houstons, where we chowed down on some of our favorite dishes, ending the night sharing a piece of their famous Key Lime Pie AND….he ordered one to go so we could have it again the next night. It was a grand day. But…because the years sometimes bring out those little bitty things that we just didn’t happen to notice about the other in the first 15 years of marriage, we have discovered that we are still learning things about each other. For example, I have learned that my darling husband considers it thrilling to wait until he is driving 65 MPH down the freeway before trying to fasten his seat belt (remember he still doesn’t have full use of his left arm and has to drive with one arm). Today when I had to grab the steering wheel to bring us back over to our lane, I told him,

” Randy, this is just a thought and maybe I”m wrong, but just maybe, wouldn’t it be fun to fasten your seat belt BEFORE leaving the driveway?” His response to me was, “it wouldn’t be as challenging” I told him that his next challenge might be trying to keep the back of a one size fits all hospital gown that only fits people who weight less than 130, closed as he walks down the halls, if he continues to do that.

My next annoyance came the other day as we were headed out to run errands. When I ask him if he took Oliver out before we left he quickly responded with , “shoot, I forgot I have a bag of poop in my pocket”! What? oh my gosh, here we are headed to the grocery store and my husband, who now goes by the name Mr. Poop Pocket, has a zip lock bag of doggie poop in his pocket. His usual routine is that after walking Oliver, he throws the small bag of you know what in the garbage before coming in the house. But for some reason, that day he forgot. I informed him that if he ever did that and I ended up throwing his shorts with poop in the pocket in the wash, well…all I can say is that it would take him more than a day of  taking me shopping and a dinner at Houstons to make up for that.

Since that day, I am getting better at checking his pockets before throwing them in the wash. I’m also learning to remind him to fasten his seatbelt before leaving our driveway. I would write to tell you about his annoyances with me, but he assures me that even after these 22 years, he couldn’t think of a thing. That’s my story and this is my blog and I will write whatever I want.

Daily Thoughts · Uncategorized

Blue Bell & The Beast

This past week Randy and I had made our 3rd trip of the week to Walmart for the things we forgot the first two trips. On our way, I happened to mention that I wonder if the guys working the security camera have names picked out for us as we walk in the store. “Oh here comes the couple who must not have enough doctor visits on their calendar to keep them busy. They either both have alzheimers and cannot remember what they came for or they eat so much they don’t have room in their house or fridge to buy everything they need in one shopping day. We should give them a name like, “Triple Trips” or “Shopping Cart Sweeties”.  Seriously, I can only imagine the conversations that go on in the camera room. “oh my gosh, look at what they are putting in the cart, and they wonder why their butts are bigger than our aisles.”  or “do they really think they can put on that $3 t-shirt and look like they walked out of Target? Please lady, put back that sleeveless shirt and walk away, your arms are still moving from you stopping the basket 5 minutes ago. Just head on over to the sweaters and cover up those awful upper arms with as much material as you can stand in the heat.”

As we arrive at the store we do out best to find a parking space that will help us get to 3000 steps on our Fitbit. As we head down the frozen food aisle, there is the end of the rainbow. Randy does a double take and comes to a screeching halt. There, down in the middle of the aisle is a man who is unloading a pallet of Blue Bell ice cream. The look on Randy’s face told me that his dreams of finally having BB back in Phoenix has come true. He doesn’t have to wait any longer. We stroll over to the freezer trying not to act like our lives have had no meaning for the year we have lived here. There, in the freezer compartment just staring back at us is the ice cream that is like no other.  I tell him to just take it all in. Look over all of the flavors and pick out his favorite flavor. He looks at me and informs me that “no, he doesn’t want to put it in the basket just yet.” Why? why is he not buying the thing that keeps him writing to Blue Bell once a month asking when are they coming back to Arizona. He told me that he will finish shopping, pay for our groceries then before we walk out the door, he will come back to the ice cream aisle and get his precious treasure, pay for it and then, we will leave.  Truly I thought he was joking. It was at this point that I began to tell him that he didn’t take this much time picking out our wedding rings. Things began to escalate. Thinking that I could go ahead and grab some items while he stayed and drooled over the ice cream section, I walked away just shaking my head. Seriously, I began to remember us picking out rings 22 years ago and remembered that as I was trying to pick out just the perfect ring, he stood beside me and coaxed me to pick out the ring that didn’t make my butt look big.  His sense of humor has always been a little off.

But here we were, finally completing our third trip of the week and all checked out. He pushed our cart to the part of the store where I usually stop on our way out and buy a huge bag of popcorn at the Subway counter before exiting the store. He told me to “take a load off”  (man is he getting so romantic now that he has his Blue Bell back) and he would be right back. So I sat and wondered just how many half gallons of Blue Bell he would come back with.  I watch him, as he goes to the self check out (which he will NEVER go to when I want to hurry) with his precious half gallon of The Great Divide, which for those of you who are not Blue Bell groupies, is half chocolate and half vanilla.  He walks quickly toward me with his ice cream in hand and tells me to hurry and lets get the groceries loaded and get home before any of the ice cream melts. I told him I had not seen him move this fast since…well, actually ever!  For those of you who know my sweet husband, you know how slow he walks.  We speed home, yes, speed home,  not even worrying about a possible ticket, and he grabs the ice cream from the back seat and as I’m hauling in the groceries, I walk in the kitchen to see him standing over the half gallon with the biggest spoon we have. His life is now complete. His Blue Bell is back and life is back to normal. He just took the whole container to the den and told me that he was not to be disturbed. I told him, I thought he was already disturbed.

Yes, life is good and I once again have a sweeter and more gentle husband. All it took was a gallon of ice cream and a flavor called The Great Divide. Maybe I’ll take him to look at new wedding rings. He might be in a little more of a shopping mood than he was years ago.