Today 102 years ago a lady was born! This lady grew up to become my mom! It wasn’t until she died that I became aware that I could still honor her without feeling a great love for her! I have written about her before, a few years ago, but as I age, I have realized that even though she was not the easiest person to get along with, and yes, she had probably been depressed for years, she taught me so many things! I remember her always telling me “don’t use the word hate” anytime I said I hated something. She taught me to respect myself and others! She taught me to “honor the Sabbath and keep it holy”

She taught me to put God first in my life! To allow Him to guide me and to live to reflect Him with my life! Did I always do that? Absolutely not! Did I try to make excuses to get out of going to church every time the doors were open? You bet!

Growing up it was always very apparent that my mom had anger issues and discontent with her marriage and her situation! But in so doing she used her time to give of herself to so many others. We always had someone living with us, whether it was a relative or just someone who needed a place to live! She went on mission trips! She cooked at church on Wednesday nights, she and my dad worked with the youth and had many many fellowships in our home! She sang in the choir, made all my clothes until Highschool, constantly took dinners to people who were sick and served at funerals for friends! Maybe she did all these things to not have to think about or deal with her situation, but she loved doing for others! No matter the reason.

As I think back about all of this, it has taught something else about the Lord. He doesn’t use us because we are perfect! None of us are! But He uses us in spite of our weaknesses and flaws! He just wants our hearts and our willingness to be used!

Having spent many years focusing on her faults, I realized a few years ago, that it was time to let all the disappointments I had of her and instead, remember that I am who I am today largely due to her goal of teaching her only child to love God and live a life that shows that! It is taking me a long time to realize that in spite of my flaws and weaknesses, I, like her, can be used by God! I never doubted that my mom loved me Even though some days she should have given up on me! But in her 93 years of life, even through her dementia took away many of her memories, and magnified the anger that she had had, she loved God and shared that Truth with so many others! Including me!

Life’s perspectives constantly change as we live and go through different circumstances and seasons. But I pray that each perspective and each circumstance will grow me closer to live to become more like my Savior!

Happy Birthday Mother! Thank you for your love, support and sacrifices you made to give me life!