Frosty’s Follies

Today Frosty suggested that we go out shopping like we use to while we lived in Dallas. To just go out all day to get among the Christmas crowds and hit the local Starbucks for a gingerbread latte and see what Santa has out this year on display. It was then that I suggested that we go looking for a new suitcase for us to take to Mexico and Italy. So off we go to look for the perfect traveling companion which would hold all our clothes that hopefully make us look like we “belong” and not like a tourist.

Getting out in this most beautiful day made me hungry. When he ask me if I was ready for the Starbucks stop, I informed him that maybe we should start off with something a little more filling, so off to Chick Fila we go, all the while me listening to him talk under his breath about “we have just left the house where there was plenty to eat but now she wants to go to Chick Fila” Maybe Frosty isn’t quite in his Christmas spirit yet. When I ask him to repeat what he had just said, he told me that he was glad we were having lunch out because then we could save the food at home for dinner. When I told him that was not what it sounded like when he was muttering, but I let this one go. After all, I didn’t want to start off our fun Christmas shopping day not speaking. So after we downed some chicken nuggets and a peppermint chocolate chip shake, we headed off to look at luggage. We stopped at a store that has a little bit of everything, (no it wasn’t Walmart) ok, it was almost Walmart, it was Ross. So after looking over the luggage and deciding that we needed to go other places before deciding, I informed Frosty that after much discussion with several friends who have traveled extensively, I wanted to go look at the backpacks. Thinking that would be a great way to carry all my necessities, leaving my arms free to hold the gelato or pizza in Italy or hail cabs in Mexico, my mind was made up to buy a backpack. I found the perfect size, beautiful, quilted olive green backpack which had some outside pockets. Asking him to hold my purse so I could try it on for size, I proudly, turn around showing him what I look like with a back pack. No I didn’t ask him if it made my rear end look big, but I did ask him what he thought. This was his reply, “well, if you really must know, you look like a Ninja Turtle”
The backpack went back on the shelf and we left the store in not so much of a holly jolly mood.

We had already decided that today we would visit the Apple Store to look at the Smart Watches. I had told our kids that instead of buying me those cute little signs that sometimes read, “what happens at Nana’s stays at Nanas or a shirt that might read, TGIF This Granny is Fantastic, I would rather them just donate to my Smart Watch Fund. So in anticipation to being gifted with one, we decided to just go look at the watches. We walked out with the cutest little Smart watch EVER. It is now synced with my phone and everything is out there in the cloud. So any money that comes in now from the kids can just go to cover a cute new color band for the watch or a new phone cover that matches the cute little watch. The first 3 hours it was the smartest watch I could imagine. But after coming home and sitting down to watch a Christmas Hallmark movie, I glance over to look at my new watch and there is an alert that is telling me to “get up and move around, you have been sitting too long.” WHAT? I now have a watch that makes me feel guilty for sitting and watching a movie? What have I done? After a little longer I get another alert telling me to breathe deeply for a minute as it is good for my brain. Are you kidding me? It knows what shape my brain is in?
If I cannot train this so called “Smart watch” a little better than it is now, it is going back to Apple. If I designed a smart watch it would go something like this:
You Go Girl….it has been over an hour since you ate a cookie, why don’t you have another one.

Ding Dong, Ding Dong, it’s time for your favorite Christmas movie, grab yourself a cup of hot cocoa and sit down and relax.

Oh Bless Your Heart, you have worked hard enough today, drive up to Donut Worry and buy that apple strudel donut you love.

Dolly Parton singing Working 9 to 5 and “just warm up the leftovers, you don’t need to cook a meal tonight.

Now that’s truly a Smart Watch that I would make. But until then, I guess I had better close and start walking around before it alerts me that I have been on this computer long enough or reminds me that I have only burned 23 calories today. And to think I paid money for all this guilt. Merry Christmas to me!

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